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Help for Hearts that Ache


Joy Jochems - Single Moms BloggerHelp for Hearts that Ache by Joy JochemsWe’ve had a heaped-up helping of heartache, you and I.

We’ve cried and hurt.

We’ve felt lost, wounded, alone, misunderstood.

We’ve asked, “Why?” and “How do I survive this?”

And yet, we stand.

We make it to tomorrow. We see a new day dawn.

2 Corinthians 4:3-4 says:

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

The implication is this: we’ve been in need of comfort ourselves a time or two! And through that comfort we receive, we are equipped to minister to others who find themselves on similar rough roads.

Maybe you’re hurting and desire for your friends to understand what you need. Maybe you need to be a comforter. Here are a handful of helps that others utilized in walking with me through periods of heartache, the same “helps” that I have also drawn from to minister to others in their times of need:

HOLD HER UP IN PRAYER. There is no greater help, no greater privilege, no greater ministry than intercession. We are taking to God Almighty the broken pieces and trusting into His capable hands the healing, the help, the hope of the hurting.

HELP HER HEAR TRUTH. God’s Word will accomplish its purposes (Isaiah 55:11). Text her Scripture, read the Bible to her, write verses on cards or sticky notes for her. Undoubtedly she’s hearing lies and battling darkness every day. Shut out the deceit with the voice of Truth. Illuminate the shadows with the Light of His presence. Our words can fail … God’s cannot.

HEAR AND LISTEN. As hard as it is for us (for me!) to do, there are times when we just need to be quiet, be the listening ear, be the shoulder to cry on. There are moments when we need to not talk so that she can simply be heard.

Ask, “HOW ARE YOU?” with frequency and sincerity. This all-important question has been trivialized in our speech. But sometimes she needs to be asked … and sometimes every day. It gives her the opportunity to say, “It’s a hard day.” The simple inquiry tells her you’re thinking of her, caring for her, praying for her.  It prompts her to share her burden and acknowledges your offer to shoulder the weight (Galatians 6:2).

HAVE HOTLINE AVAILABILITY. She needs to know there’s someone she can contact ANYtime. That in those moments when the loneliness is suffocating or the demons are relentless or the worries won’t flee or she feels like giving up – that she can receive from you encouragement, Truth, a listening ear, a prayer…without condemnation.

The truth of this is we’re not called to fix it (or her or them). We’re called
to comfort (2 Corinthians 1:3-4),
to pray (James 5:16),
to build up (I Thessalonians 5:11),
to share burdens (Galatians 6:12).

The Healer will do His job. May we be eager and faithful to do ours.


ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Joy Jochems has been in ministry literally her whole life. While Joy is actively involved with her local church as youth ministry coordinator and lends a hand at CWAHM as devotional coordinator and guest contributor, she recognizes that her primary ministry is in her home, to her children. You can contact Joy at

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