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May
23

Upgrade Mentality

By

phoneI have been thinking a lot lately about my phone. You see, I have made it last another 2 years and my current contract is up.  So, I can upgrade to a new phone.  Undoubtedly, a sleeker, cooler, faster, better, prettier, smarter phone.  So, a month ago, I started researching phones (again).

Then a funny thought entered my head while I was driving home from lunch:  Why do I even have to or want to upgrade my current phone?

Seriously, what’s wrong with it?

After a few feeble protests from my big SELF, I concluded that I do not HAVE to upgrade at all.  I won’t go through all my reasonings here, because that would take too long and would be very boring for you.  However, I will say that it made me think about my mentality:  it’s all about upgrading.  It reminds me of what some people were saying way back when that “we’ve become a throw away society”: just throw it away if it doesn’t work for you anymore, doesn’t fit you, etc.  Go buy or get another _______.”

I wonder, well, actually I don’t wonder anymore about this because I do believe we have so become accustomed to upgrading, throwing out the old & replacing things, that it has crept into our beliefs about marriages and our spouses: “Just divorce him; you can do better than him.”  We see it all around us, on TV, the internet, our family and friends’ marriages.

It seems also that people are not too fond of rules anymore.  Rules of any kind.  We want our freedom so much, but no constraints.  No limitations.  No consequences.  But there are consequences!  And some will learn the hard way.  I remember stealing candy bars as a 16 year old from the gas station. We met there so often that we knew the attendant by name!  I forget if my friend dared me or how it all started.  I recall feeling so terrified at first, afraid of getting caught. What would my mother do? {She was not the type to say, but rather DO if you get my meaning.}  But nothing happened the first time. Nor the second, third, and so on.  I started feeling less afraid.  I became bolder.  If I can steal one candy bar, why not two this time? Again, I succeeded.  (With hindsight, of course, this is one area you do not want your kid to succeed in!)

So, that is how my life of crime continued.  Actually, my mother encouraged it even before that.  You see, we were very poor.  So, when we needed new sneakers, my mom would take us to the store and have us try on new ones.  When no one was looking, we’d make the switch and put our old sneakers in the box and wear the new ones out of the store.  We had dirt or pens in our pocket so we could ‘dirtier them up’, make them look used.  I don’t recall there being security cameras in the store, or at least not in the shoe dept. So stealing a 25 cent candy bar didn’t really seem like such a crime.

So, have you thought of ‘upgrading’ your husband lately? Or maybe it’s your kids you’d like to upgrade or change?  Don’t entertain these thoughts! Don’t even go there! It  will only aggravate your mood and situation.  It will profit you nothing. I do believe there are rules in marriage.  They are there for your happiness and protection, as well as protection for your loved ones.  Oh, by the way, I did get caught and it was an awful experience! There are always consequences to our actions. And our thoughts. Beware!

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:  Pam Bass is a wife, mom, and licensed Christian counselor, who has helped hundreds of people over the last 23 years.  She desires wives especially to be cognizant of the way the American culture can influence our stated Christian values.  Through her blog, she hopes to encourage women (in particular) to  know and trust what God tells us in His word.  Find out more at www.pambass.com

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